My Little Assassin
by PirateKefka
Summary: As the international terror organization DISCORD attempts to bring chaos to the world, it'll take special forces to ensure global harmony. These are the stories of the Princess's Cabal.
1. The Elegant Intruder?

DISCORD Mobile Base #28A. Nameless guards did their rounds across the catwalks of the massive moving structure as amidst the ventilation, a woman in a dark bodysuit crawled through, a pair of ruby tinted glasses over her eyes had small LED dots and lines that seemed to move about.

"In 30 seconds, at the guards current pace," a voice reverberated in the woman's left ear without being audible in any other way, "the grate that is reachable after a left turn will be completely out of view and will provide an ideal entry."

"Thanks Spike," the woman whispered, "But I can see that perfectly without your help." She silently shuffled to the grate which was predictably unguarded. Maneuvering her lithe body in the tight shaft, she got her high-heeled boots against the corners of the opening and forced the bolts to shear and snap off. A firm kick to the other side knocked the grating clear off, landing on the catwalk with a loud crash. Several dots on the woman's glasses pulsed and started to move towards the center.

"I think they heard th-"

"I KNOW THEY HEARD THAT!" she whisper-screamed as she slipped out of the vent and immediately grabbed onto the rails of the catwalk, dropping off to the outside and falling out of immediate line of sight of the two guards that came rushing in from each side. Hand over hand, she shimmied away under the catwalk, holding still when the guard went overhead, the powerful stomps of his combat boots nearly shaking her grip loose. The two guards looked over the bent and detached grate as the woman silently lifted herself over the railing, landing gracefully and making a completely muzzled sound that did not draw attention of the guards.

She reached into two hidden pockets on her thighs to pull out a dagger in each hand. With each blade at the ready, she leaped at the guards and with a quick thrust pierced each guard right through their necks. Dying instantly, the guards fell as the radio sounded with a voice of urgency.

"As bea-beauti- as well done as that was, the blood is going to drop to the ground as this catwalk is-"

"I know that the catwalk isn't completely solid, Spike. I'm can see it and one of my heels is through one of the holes."

"Y-Yes, Rarity, I'm just very cautious because you're...a very valuable member of the Princess's Cabal."

"You don't get on Twi's case when she builds an elaborate set up for one target, that can and has backfired before! "

"W-Well that's just," he was flustered to find an answer, "her style"

"And my style is to provide a loving shining flair to my work. Now, Spike dear, you should pay attention to the fact that Pierced Throat A is going to miss his check-in in about a minute."

"I-yes, and there are three guards on the way to the engine room."

"And two others between me and the cargo room."

"RARITY DON'T YOU DAR-*bwoop*" the woman tapped her ear to turn off the radio, flicking her daggers clean and sliding them back into her pockets.

"Boring conversation anyways."

Leaving the catwalk, she enjoyed some loving silence as she reached the main level of the base, effortlessly slashing the throat of a guard that never saw her coming. Tapping her glasses, she sent an inaudible ping from the still technically muted radio to give her a new heads-up map and a clear path to a room in the back which she easily deciphered to be a room containing items stolen by DISCORD members. With a smile and a hand on the hilt of a dagger she snuck through the hallways, having a clear shot at the one guard overlooking several crates, ready to strike him dow-

"RARITY DO NOT MUTE ME AGAIN! We made the mute temporary because of your past incidents." the radio resonated as she let out a silent sigh before retreating to out of earshot of the guard.

"Spike, dear, it is very important that I let loose this cargo before blasting this base to kingdom come," she whispered, "and I would appreciate it if you understood how important that i-"

"OK, who told you that this was the base that housed those gems that were stolen fro-CRAP!-"

"Thanks, dearie!" It was obvious that she had gotten info from her partner in that manner before. In a flash of purple, Rarity charged as she flew into the guard, embedding her blade right into the man's chest. Without any living guards in the general area, she overlooked the assortment of crates in the cargo room. "So, Spike, we're gonna need door codes."

"Rarity, we really nee-"

"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?" she asked in her sweetest voice, as she could hear the boy groan in the background. Hook, line, and sinker.

"Fine, fine, look at the console and I'll find them." Rarity's red visor scanned over the computer right next to a massive cargo door before a set of numbers flashed over on her visor.

"Thanks, dearie. You get a kiss on the cheek when I get back." She quickly punched in the numbers as the giant door blasted open and the restraints on the cargo snapped apart. As the crates flew out the door, the alarms began to blare. "...dammit. Spike, how come this one has an alarm for the cargo hold? The last four didn't! Spike!"

"'mgettingakiss"

"Dammit, he's gone. I guess it's my show from now on." She hopped out of sight from the oncoming guards dashing through the halls, blade extended to stab the first guard who foolishly ran into the cargo hold right in the face. Two other guards readied their guns and fired down the hall, however could not get any shots off before any of her was still in range.

Realizing that without any cargo boxes, there was no way for Rarity to hide from the remaining attackers. She clenched her blade handles and dug her heels in, watching the blips over her vision. The guards peeled up before hitting the end of the hallway, she knew that their guns would be at the ready when they turn the corner. In the seconds of anticipation, she slammed her boot to the ground and chucked her dagger at the hallway. The guard threw himself out and tried to shoot at the origin of the sound, but the blade slammed into his head. Handle first. Still, the blunt force of the dagger handle was still enough to knock him off balance and force him to lose grip of his weapon.

"OH DAMMIT!" Rarity dashed to the dazed guard and grabbed ahold of the guard's gun. She fired it wildly into the hall, able to strike the other, very confused guard in the chest. She then turned the gun on the first guard, nailing him at point blank range. She threw the gun down and hastily picked up her own weapon. "Nasty inelegant firearms. No grace. No divini-ENGINE ROOM!"

She ran down the hall, following each turn as denoted on her glasses. "Spike! I'm gonna nee-"

"Yeshhhhh? Hehehehehehehe-"

"SPIKE! DOWNLOAD! NOW!" The no longer silent invader screamed to snap her mission control out of his love-drunkenness, "We've been here far too long!"

"Yea-YEAH! The engine room is highlighted on the HUD, get in view of the console and I can get the self-destruct codes!"

"Goodgoodgood!" In a haste, she nearly crashed into the artificially glowing room and found another computer, which quickly was hacked in thanks to the codes that Spike was feeding through to her ruby visor.

[SELF-DESTRUCT INITIATED]

Wiping sweat off her brow, she turned around and began to walk away with a smile and seductive walk, gesturing a finger from her temple to the overloading engine.

[T-MINUS THIRTY SECONDS]

"WHAT?" her gaze turned into a look of shock as she turned a swaying saunter into a mad sprint. Even with high-heeled boots, she was still able to keep a high pace and essentially flung herself through the hallways, into the cargo hold, and out the massive cargo door as the vehicle she was escaping exploded behind her. She slammed into the ground and ducked as the base erupted into flames. As Rarity got up, she walked down the tread tracks to find the cargo crates, stuffed to the brim with diamonds, jewels, and pearls.

"That...could've gone better, Rarity."

"Eh, don't worry, Spike. We have confirmation of the destruction of Mobile Base #28A. Requesting air pickup for 8 large crates."

"Yeah. Just, Rarity,"

"Yes, dearie?"

"Don't scare me like that again. I'd...We'd hate to lose you."

"Awwww, little Spikey's worried about lil old me."

"N-No! I mean, uh, I mean..."

"Glory to the Princess, dear."

"G-Glory to the Princess! Mission Complete!"


	2. The Proctor

The man was frightened. He couldn't have seen what he saw. The harbinger of death, a sight that no one with sin in his heart can witness and live to tell the tale. He ran through the alleys of the city, making his mind forget what he saw.

The Green Flame.

Somehow, someway, if the green flame was in an area, it was under "her" control. It was a horror story passed around DISCORD members, but no one could ever confirm its existence while living. Somehow, visual records of members in their final moments were locked and returned to DISCORD bases featuring strange sights, but always a green flame could be seen in the background as members were eliminated in full view of the camera.

The agent turned past corner after corner, but always in his view was the green flame, seemingly marking him for death. After turns and turns, locked door after locked door, the man finally tackled his way through a pair of double doors into a large storeroom, only lit by the moonlight through the doors that were just broken through.

Until they slammed shut.

"Well, someone's early for the exam, I see! You must be so excited to see if you've got the guts to pass." An enthusiastic female voice came from the darkness before beaming spotlights shone on a single school desk. "In that case, we can start immediately once you have a seat. The sooner we can start, the sooner we will be done."

Sensing an obvious trap, the man withdrew a handgun from his person and walked slowly towards the desk. Taking the safety off, he pointed the weapon to the darkness in front of desk and fired two shots. The muzzle flash showed a dark silhouette, unmoving in the split second that the room was lit. He knew he wasn't alone in this dark room.

"I must ask that in order for a safe testing environment, all weapons must be confiscated." The gun was pulled out of the man's hands by an unseen force, falling into the darkness. "Now please take a seat so that we may begin. If you do not adhere to testing protocols, you will be dismissed." A whizzing sound shot right by his ear with a very discernible "shing!". Unsure what that item was, the man hesitantly approached the desk and after a deep breath and a prayer muttered, took a seat.

The room blasted open in light as the silhouette became a visible being. In a purple tinted plaid sweater and black capris, the woman donning violet hair with a pink streak walked towards the man in the desk, holding a sheet of paper on a clipboard, "this is an oral exam with three questions. You have 20 seconds to answer each one. In order to pass, you must correctly get all three answers right. Let us begin, shall we?" She smiled as a metal restraint shot from the desk chair over the man's lap, locking him in.

"Question 1: What is the codename for the dystopian international terror organization that has the creedo 'Order Through Chaos'?"

The man looked up at the girl in shock. He knew that she knew who he was. He stared her down as she only held up an open palm, then folded in her thumb, followed by her pinkie. "DISCORD! The answer," he groaned, "is DISCORD."

"Correct!" the girl clapped her hand against the clipboard in what had to be a sarcastic show of support. She looked at her papers again, preparing the next problem for the man to answer. "Question 2: How many gunshots have fired since you entered this building?"

"...Two?" the man was puzzled as to why such a strange question was asked for this test. The woman smiled from ear to ear

"Correct again! You're one right answer away from freedom! QUESTIONNNNNNNNN-" she showed an previously unseen exhilaration before shoving her hand, showing three fingers, into the man's face, "THREEEEE! Earlier tonight, something whizzed by your head. It is going to fly through the room again in 20 seconds. What is it?"

His eyes shot open. He had no clue what that thing was. What was she meaning when she said it was gonna fly through again? She's right in his field of vision, she can't find it and grab it to throw it again. However, the lights were on now, he could try and glance over where he thought it landed. But then she could leave his field of vision. Could he guess? What would happen if he got it wrong? The girl held up her hand for five seconds remaining. Four. Three. How could that thing go flying again if she was right there counting down? Two. One.

*shink!*

The man spasmed in his chair, eyes rolling back in his head. Blood seeped out of his eye sockets before his body fell forward, revealing a handle sticking out of the back of his head. She reached over to pull in out of the man's split skull.

"Sorry, DISCORD scum, you ran out of time. The answer," she dislodged the weapon and pulled out the blood-coated blade, "was a tomahawk. A tomahawk." She flicked her wrist to shake off the blood before lifting it up in the air, allowing it to rocket towards a wall-mounted magnet, which already held the gun that was forced from the victim earlier. Pulling a pen from her ear, she crossed off the picture of her victim, which was the only thing on the clipboard.

"Mission complete. Glory to the Princess."


	3. DISCORD Agent File: Great and Powerful

WARNING: DISCORD Elite Agent. Do not engage. _[Don't be a hero, Rarity, seriously. - S]_

NAME: Trixie

ALIAS: "The Great and Powerful" _[don't ask - S]_

CRIMES: She is very keen on trapping a large crowd, masquerading as a traveling magician. Once a crowd is gathered, they are trapped as she performs her show while DISCORD agents set up a large scale deathtrap as the innocents are distracted. Always a flair for the dramatic, she will always call upon a volunteer from the enthralled crowd and perform a dangerous trick. The trick will always fail, resulting in the death of the volunteer. After that, the crowd is doomed as the trap is set off, killing them all.

Her wide deathtraps vary. Some that have been recorded include a steel wire to run through and vivisect the victims quickly. There are also toxicity cases recorded by places she has attacked, implying that poison gas has been used in the past. _[Really bad stuff, skin-peeling. Not pretty. - S]_ Other large-scale traps are possible, but unrecorded. _[We believe that the burning ruins of Coltimore are the result of a fire-related trap from her - S]_

STRENGTHS: Incredible charisma and an ability to sucker in all but the incredibly strong willed into the doomed crowd. _[Charm spell? Does that exist? Twi, get back to me on that. - S]_ A master illusionist, has escaped from Cabal clutches in the past even when believed to be completely cornered. Can and has persuaded innocents to fight for her, even taking blows as human shields. Fallen Cabal recordings have even recalled potential necromancy when fighting her. _[We think. The recording just said "Oh dear Celestia why? How is that person moving? I blew off its arm". He sounded like he was about to...uh...mess his pants. Once again, not pretty. - S]_ Trixie has been able to escape from or kill every Cabal agent sent to fight her.

POSSIBLE WEAKNESSES: A flair for the dramatic might be her downfall. She has been distracted while putting on a show, allowing Cabal agents to both save potential victims and corner her. More an escapist than a fighter. _[We just need to get her completely and totally cornered without an iota of escape possibility. - S]_ Easily agitated if things don't go exactly her way and then prone to screw-ups and open to attack.

IDEAS: We need to learn how to be proactive rather than reactive. We have yet to uncover a theming or prediction as to where she will show up, and despite her massive deathtraps, they are unnoticeable until the show begins. _[By then, it's too late.- S]_ Discover a potential future location for a show, learn how she can seamlessly set up the trap, and stop her before any innocent of Cabal member is killed.

REMINDER: DO NOT ENGAGE OUTSIDE OF SPECIFIC ORDERS TARGET IS EXTREMELY DANGEROUS AT ALL TIMES.

End Document. Glory to the Princess


	4. The Bulletproof Farmgirl

Amassed in the grounds of the apple trees, a girl and her dog knelt in the cover of the forest. Staked out with her shotgun and lugging a massive sledgehammer on her back, she listened to the small movements coming from the animals, the wind, and one other thing. Tilting her head to the origin of a very non-animal crunch through the branches, she nodded at the dog, a hulking brute of a beast, as it dashed off in that direction.

As the canine dashed off, the woman lightly treaded, following the footsteps of her companion. Listening to the sounds, she heard the beast's bark and the rustling became much more hasty. Finally a satisfying crunch echoed through the sky, followed by a blood-curdling scream.

"She found ya." with a happy drawl, the woman cocked her shotgun with a smile.

* * *

><p>Bruised and bloody, the man ran through the forest for his life. The resounding echoes of a menacing dog bark ensured that he had to keep running. The beast already had his scent and if he couldn't lose his hunter, his life would end soon. Yet at the same time, he knew that the canine was not the worst part of being hunted. Every shadow couldn't be trusted as he already had a gushing leg wound after the dog's surprise attack. He just needed to make it to a base, to get to safety, to stay alive.<p>

*grrrrrrrrrrr*

That dog growl was close...way too close. He turned his head to come face to face with a ravenous beast, but it wasn't attacking. The hunted could only stare, even though he had a handgun hidden under his coat, as sudden movement would easily cause a strike from the beast. The dog stared and stared, waiting for its target to make a move. He could only look on in fear, breathing heavily, trying to find a way out.

*BANG*

The tree near the man and beast splintered into a million pieces. The man realized that no matter what, staying where he was would be a guaranteed way for his life to end. He could only get up on his injured leg, hobbling and hobbling as another tree exploded right by him. Several large shards of wood slammed against him, knocking him to the ground.

* * *

><p>"Tough little sprout. Make sure 'e doesn't git up, Winona." the woman reloaded her weapon as the dog once chased after the target. She watched as Winona dove onto the mark, latching a massive chomp onto his forearm, pulling the meat from his bone as he screamed in agony. Hemorrhaging blood as his arm went pale and numb, the man was completely disillusioned due to his incredibly lowering life force and could only see a human-shaped blob descending atop of him. Using his one good arm, he reached into his coat to pull out his handgun. If he was gonna die, he was gonna take his hunter out with him. He fired at the shape, emptying the chamber, littering the woman with lead. Losing his energy, his arm fell back to the ground, and immediately exploded in a mess of blood, muscles, and bone splinters.<p>

"Now Ah wouldn't be any good if it took a bunch of bullets from that dang pea-shooter to take me out, sugah." The hunter's shotgun was recently discharged, blasting the man's arm apart as the bullets only embedded themselves shallowly into her skin, with only one or two even drawing blood, similar to that of a papercut. She reached behind her back to pull out the massive mallet on her back, dropping the head of it to the ground with a resounding thud. "Ah don't think ya have many breaths left if Ah stopped 'ere. But Ah heard you've done work for dose rascal brothers that destroyed mah family's farm. So," she effortlessly lifted the sledgehammer over her head, and with eyes aflame, she slammed it down on the target's head, crushing it like a watermelon.

"Glory to ta Princess. Death to DISCORD. Death to ta Flim Flam Brothers."


	5. Pastel Party Powerhouse

"I'd hardly call her elegant in her methods. Quite garish, honestly. I mean, her outfits, her weapons, they are all incredibly tacky and are hardly considered cultured. But she somehow gets the job done and done well. Not to mention that I've yet to hear of a single DISCORD agent who lived upon seeing...Pinkie Pie."

* * *

><p>The guard stood in front of the entrance of a small camp, well armed and with a license to kill. Doing his rounds and watching for intruders trying to sneak in and be filled with lead. Had to keep his eyes and ears open, no one was gonna sneak by-<p>

*Crash! Crash! Crash! Crash Crash Crash!*

That was definitely not someone sneaking into the camp, it was more like a parade approaching. Granted some of the Elite Agents were showoffs, but this wasn't their style. As fireworks screamed through the skies, a small pink figure emerged from the horizon. Several brass horns wrapped around her body, a bass drum being beat on her back, and other various cymbals and tambourines blasting about.

* * *

><p>"Statistically speaking, she should have been killed years ago. Horrific stealth, very unusual weaponry that I have no clue how she has such an efficient kill rate with, and what I can only describe as idiotic strategy. But I've reached the point that there is no Cabal member I can trust with a mission that she will come out with complete success more than her. A complete statistical anomaly. And I'm glad she's one of us."<p>

* * *

><p>"HI!" Her hair, which already looked like the results of a cotton candy explosion, bounced all about as the guard could only watch. "I'm Pinkie Pie and I am a traveling party salesman!"<p>

"Traveling? Party? Sa-"

"But don't bust out your wallet just yet, sir! With Double P Parties, you get the luxury of a fantastic party that you and your group will never forget!" She started to pull random items out of a way too small bag on her hip, "We have balloons, rubber swords, rubber chickens, noisemakers, and the most intense party poppers you have ever seen!" She beamed with joy as she pointed the party popper towards the guard's chest and pulled the string.

*POP*

Amidst the deafening pop and strings of confetti falling to the ground, the guard could only stare down the girl as his skin began to pale. A cascade of blood fell from the hole that developed in the man's chest. The popper happened to have contained enough power inside it to be similar in force to a shotgun. Pinkie gave the man the corniest grin and a wave as he fell over, dead.

* * *

><p>"Dat dere Pinkie Pie, she is a card. Ah worry every day dat she packs more music instruments than weapons on a mission and dat'll be da end of 'er. But, e'rytime she comes back with a full kill chart and ah can't believe it. Ah've even partnered wit' 'er and ah couldn't believe what ah saw. Kills wit' stuff dat shouldn't get kills in any way. Just plain incredible."<p>

* * *

><p>Now with complete access to the camp, the pastel killer dropped off the random horns wrapped around her body, while keeping a pair of cymbals strapped to her hands to be used quickly as one of the guards who heard the loud pop ran to the source only to find his head crushed like a grape between the pieces of percussion with a loud *CRASH*. Pinkie threw the instruments of murder to the ground, as the added imprints of skull and brain gave the cymbals not nearly as satisfying a bang anymore. Running to a safe place, she caught sight of the target. Not a DISCORD agent but a DISCORD machine. A Flimflam Ultra Terra Disruptor, a dangerous drill that could create a horrific earthquake that could decimate cities. Always with the ego to denote their handiwork, the red and white stripes gave the simple minded party assassin one thought.<p>

"CANDY CANE!"

* * *

><p>"Oh man, you want me to talk about Pinkie Pie? That girl...is crazy. But would I fight her? Dear Princess no, no-o-o-o-oho. Pinkie just has some sort of spirit watching her or something and...it's scary. If she wants to do something, she can do it, even if it's ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE. It's just...so...cool."<p>

* * *

><p>"Wait, no, candy cane means Flimflam. Flimflam gets destroyed! Applejack and the Princess wants everything Flimflam destroyed! Destroy the candy cane!" She launched herself towards the drill, reaching into her bag and pelting the base with a seemingly endless amount...of pies. Each pie hit the machine with a satisfying *SPLAT*, but no other effect seemed to follow.<p>

"We know you're there, Dog of the Princess!"

Of course there were more DISCORD agents as Pinkie for once seemed to pull out something normal from her bag, a simple pistol. Speeding through the corners of the tents, she could tell that there were footsteps following her as she snaked across. Finally showing signs of seriousness in her work, she tossed a few random items out of her bag away from her to cause a loud crash away from her. Predictably, a pair of DISCORD agents fell for the misdirection as they moved towards a pile of various musical instruments. Without a chance to react, they both found themselves falling down face first into them. One of the agent fell atop a standing clarinet as the mouthpiece shot through his eye and had enough force to not stop until it burst through the back of the man's skull. The other agent luckily hit on a much fortunate part of the pile, bouncing off the bell of a trumpet and falling again on his back. Before he could regain consciousness, the fluffy haired killer pinned him and placed her pistol against the side of his head.

* * *

><p>"Pinkie...scares me. I mean, um, no offense, but, um, well, she seems to take a horrible joy in making her targets suffer. I...I have trouble watching her work and sometimes I feel sorry for the poor DISCORD Agent. UM, I MEAN, um, um, well, those targets still deserve to die for their crimes against the world and against the Princess, but sometimes it feels that Pinkie...is hiding something. And, she always makes sure she has no witnesses to her final kill, and that always makes me feel...afraid."<p>

* * *

><p>"All alone now, the last party guest." Pinkie's voice had changed, the bounce of her usual style had deflated out, and the doomed man's vision cleared enough to see that her bright pink poofy hair was doing the same, as groups of strands fell flat down her head. "You're the luckiest one, you get to see this side of me. The me that your boss made." The pinned target could only shake in fear as he proceeded to let loose tears from his eyes and his bladder down his pant leg.<p>

"Sp-sp-spaaaa..." he tried to beg for his life as the now-straight haired girl continnued to press the pistol against his skull. "Spare...me..."

"You never spared anyone when you had the upper hand, did you? Not even the children, I bet. But that's for the best, I'm sure, DISCORD scum. Because you know what happens when you let the little child live? You let a cute, innocent five year old live when all she sees in her head when she tries to turn it off is the bloodied mutilated corpses of her family? You know what you get?"

The man was babbling incoherently from fear, soaked in tears and urine, waiting for his suffering to end.

"You get me."

*click*

There was no gunshot, but the man's eyes sprang open in shock. Pinkie pulled the gun away from the man's head as a little spear was coming out the barrel. The object was bloody as it was shot into the DISCORD agent's brain with no issue blasting through his skull. Pulling the gun away more showed another item attached to the spear that unfurled as it reached the open air. A small flag with one simple word.

"BANG!"

Pinkie looked at the bloodied toy as she ensured that the pierced brain was enough to kill the final agent. She closed her eyes and took several deep breaths, letting her traumatic memories replay in her head a few times before standing up and walked slowly away from the camp. At a safe distance, she pulled a rubber duck out of her bag and squeezed it for an adorable squeaking sound, followed by the pounding of the massive explosion that was set off by the pies. The sound of the duck somehow blasted her hair up to the curly mess that it was beforehand as she tapped her ear radio.

"Flimflam Drillybob has gone kablooie, all DISCORD Agents in the area are pushing up daisies, and I think I'm gonna try a fantastic cake recipe for testing in the Intel Room! Glory to the Princess! Yay!"


	6. DISCORD Agent File: Bing Bang Zam

WARNING: DISCORD Elite Agent. Do Not Engage

NAMES: Flim, Flam

ALIAS: The Flimflam Brothers

CRIMES: Originally a pair of very talented engineers, a demonstration of a new set of farming equipment was a front as it turned one of the world's most beloved farmsteads in Sweet Apple Acres to a scorched and salted ruin and outed the brothers as DISCORD agents. _[The addition of Applejack and Big Macintosh to the Cabal as a result have been very helpful to the Princess, however we all wish that it did not come at such a price - S]_ Since then, multitudes of Flimflam accessories have gone rogue, operating outside their advertised programming and attacking innocents and causing massive destruction to both civilization and nature. Thanks to the Princess, we have since been able to destroy said items and now only deal with recent creations of the pair. Their creations are well loved by DISCORD members, able to cause enormous damage if not eliminated before activation. Obviously the best way to stop the creation of these devices would be to locate and execute the duo. _[Easier said than done, as you will find out -S]_

STRENGTHS: Despite being more creators than anything, the pair are very capable fighters. Inseparable, no single member could attempt to infiltrate and eliminate the brothers by their lonesome. _[AJ has tried, it was the only time she has been forced to retreat due to being overwhelmed by forces - S]_ In addition, it seems the two of them share a mental link with each other, which allows a brother to spot an assailant coming for the other sibling and will instantly alert the target about the attack. With two sets of eyes and two sets of ears, stealth is incredibly difficult to be sustained against the pair. In addition, and this is unfounded, but the pair appear to have a very dangerously high healing factor to the point where they heal faster than any damage that can be placed. As a result, they are currently considered INVINCIBLE until further information is gathered.

POSSIBLE WEAKNESSES: Very showy and very noticeable, will never have issues finding them in order to send reconnaissance. _[As long as we can guarantee that the safety of the recon men we send out - S]_ Their supposed healing factor has not been fully tested, so it could be possible to knock it out after sustained damage.

IDEAS: Divide and conquer. If we can separate the two and take them on individually, they will be much more manageable in a fight. _[I'm sure AJ and Big Mac will lovingly volunteer for that mission if we can get them separated - S]_ Their healing factor would be heavily strained if they take major damage in single blows, such as blasts that result in amputations or gushing blood. However, no Cabal member has very successful in inflicting enough major damage in one blow to see how successful that plan is. But with the predictable pattern that the brothers implement a plan, we can send a proper sized taskforce to both upend any destructive machine and divide and corner the brothers for elimination. Just never underestimate the power of the pair or their machines. We can never have a repeat of the destruction of Sweet Apple Acres and expect to ever reach an advantageous position again.

REMINDER: DO NOT ENGAGE OUTSIDE OF SPECIFIC ORDERS TARGET IS EXTREMELY DANGEROUS AT ALL TIMES.

End Document. Glory to the Princess


	7. The Technicolor Grappling Technician

"6:00. Right on time." Two floors up, the girl hung in the windowsill of one of multitudes of nameless nondescript buildings wearing a very indiscreet ensemble. A bright blue jumpsuit somehow was the more low-key part of her getup as a wild multicolored hairstyle and similarly rainbow-arrayed cape flowing behind her back. As the small figure walked along the road, the woman opened her arms, making the cape full before dropping off. She used her cape to glide closer and closer to the unsuspecting target, finally lining up perfectly to close her cape and drop directly on the man, taking him to the ground hard.  
>Blindsided by the dropping assailant, the man could not recover fast enough to feel his right arm twisted and pinned against his back before every muscle began to sear in pain from the stress. As the woman continued to force the hammerlock onto her target, she decided to give the future human pretzel a reason for his suffering, "DISCORD agent responsible for a bank robbery and a hostage situation. A bit below my station, but it'll teach all the other petty agents that their little bits of chaos are still judged by the Princess!" With one sudden jerk, a resounding crack followed by the man's agonized screaming echoed through the block.<p>

-I'd hardly call that efficient, Dashie.-

The woman jumped up off the man, who was crying in pain and trying to soothe his now broken right arm, and looked upon the walls for another person. The soulless buildings offer no other living being even remotely close to hearing range of the attack, even though she heard a familiar voice ringing through her ears. "You don't have to be here. I DON'T ANSWER TO YOU ANYMORE!" Her distracted yelling allowed the man to throw his good arm into a tackle, bringing the girl down. He stomped down on her chest as she coughed up the air being rocketed out of her body.

"Below your station? Don't think a cocky girl like you should be spouting those words as that mouth will be the end of you!" He lifted up his foot to stomp again, but she grasped the man's ankle and swept her body through the man's standing foot.

-Bush league.-

"SHUT! UP!" The so-called "Dashie" again screamed at the emptiness as she picked herself up effortlessly, keeping the man's ankle in her grasp and twisting him into an ankle lock. She was bending the foot intensely, nearly completely backwards. "Break, dammit! YOU ARE NOT GETTING THE BEST OF ME!" Her light-blue outfit clashed with her furiously red skin before her lack of concentration allowed her target to pull his leg back and kicked her grip loose. She recoiled several steps back and seethed, reaching behind her cape and pulling out a sword scabbard. Dark blue in color and adorned with yellow lightning bolts, the name "WONDERBOLT" written on it like a fourteen year old boy would think is cool. She unsheathed the blade and held it in her right hand.

-That sword is an iaito, Dashie. You know that. You are using it horribly improperly-

"I TOLD YOU TO SHUT!" She haphazardly slashed at the man, scoring an unclean hit into the man's previously good arm, digging halfway into his shoulder before she dug the blade back out. "THE FUCK!" Another slash, slamming into and cutting a few inches into his hip. "UP!" She went high, digging right into the man's neck. His eyes rolled up in his head as blood shot out from the last and game ending wound. She dug out the blade and threw it to the ground. Blinded by rage, she booted the corpse's head. The already weakened neck could not keep hold as the man's head separated and shot out several feet.

-Completely amateurish and immature, Dashie. Pathetic.-

"SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP! PLEASE! ...please...shut up..." She dropped to her knees as tears welled up in her eyes. The invisible woman scolding her was too much for the girl to handle as tears fell to the ground. After a few seconds, the sadness once again gave way to rage as she threw her sword to the ground. She threw herself at the decapitated body, picking it up effortlessly by the legs and swinging it at the buildings and showering the area in blood. "GOD! DAMN! STUPID! NOT! HERE! STUPID! COOZE! BETRAYER! SKANK! TRAITOR! YOU! WERE! MY! BEST! FR-" her mouth locked up at that word as she flung the battered cadaver down the alley.

"Dash! Rainbow! RD! Yo girl! Soothe yourself!" A buzzing voice came from her ear radio. Much more soothing and much more welcome as her breathing lightened and her motions became less sporadic. She tapped her ear to active talkback.

"Vinyl. It happened again."

"The record keeps skipping. Listen, girl. This blows, yeah. But your work is really suffering because of it. You were the most rocking steady dispatch this side of the crazy pink one but once-" the operator stopped herself, hoping not to anger the girl any more.

"I know. It's just...she was..."

"She was all our friend. Granted a little on the jerk side, but she meant good. At least we thought so."

"I'm gonna get her."

"Not yet. It's a death trap. You need to get back to 100 percent mentally and emotionally. Can't drop you in until we know you're ready to rock."

"She's gonna pay for what she did to-."

"We'll make sure she pays," the op interrupted, "but she is classified as an Elite DISCORD Agent until further notice. That's a track that's way too hard to take on, even when you're running on all mixers."

The girl sighed and seeked out her discarded Wonderbolt blade, picking it up and resheathing it. She looked up at the night sky and clenched her weapon.

"Vinyl. Mission Complete. Glory to the Princess." She gave another deep breath, "And Gilda. I'm coming for your head."


End file.
